ashes to ashes funk to funky

why, i'm blogging again, won't you look at that? seeing as i can't compose my thoughts into poetry or stories, i'll have to write somehow, or my life really is an utter waste of time. these past few, unproductive weeks i have been doing jack all: mindlessly wandering on facebook, general computering, hanging with the unloved kids, and blowing my nose. i have a cold, for the first time in ages. that's what i get for laughing at ill people and rubbing it into their face that i'm not ill. the plot has thickened, however, amidst general petty annoyances. I'm faced with a very sticky situation. Now, dickens has made it glaringly obvious that he likes me, but the sad fact is, i don't like him. sorry, dickens. anyway, i'm going to have to let him know sometime. it feels kind of scary to have that much power over someone, and knowing that one word can determine their felicity. I don't know if i like it.

Any other advancements? My fashion sense has changed, again, and i love it. I look forward to getting dressed more than i do getting out. So that makes me materialistically happy, at least. I'm just casually, taciturnly observing social situations around me. Last month's jeans don't seem to be in vogue, anymore. well, they won't be in a few weeks. It's funny watching how people behave when they know their temporary popularity is slipping away; they become more desperate, more obsequious. Anyway, social situations closer at hand are changing at an alarming rate. I may find myself with no friends, what with Golding and Hemingway becoming best pals, but i can't say the prospect is bothering me too much. As long as i have people i like who i get along with, I don't really mind.

asides from that, I keep getting momentary flashes of genius, about ten seconds or so, in which i think i can explain the world and all the words formulate together so well, and i'd love to write it down, but it slips away, and my transient enlightenment lapses into apathy.

there's nothing else to say, really.

apart from that the new marina and the diamonds album is coming out

i can't wait for that, she really is very, very good. I sincerely hope her most popular song doesn't get bummed by chavs, or that she gets overrated and alters her sound to suit a more mainstream audience

I'm invisible

I wonder if anyone can see me?

i can see alot of life in you, i can see alot of bright in you, and i think that dress looks nice on you

light banter is driving me round the fucking bend

has the world changed or have i changed?

i've been watching south park and various films for the whole weekend; and i've just been very idle. That was a bit of a waste of life. but i can't be bothered, again..

don't worry kyoko, mummy's only looking for her hand in the snow

nothing much to report, really. I missed two days of school because of snow, had normal snowy fun and it was all very nice. I'm not going out today because I don't want to get bored of the snow; there's plenty more where it came from. I'm oddly at peace, in a bored sort of way, which is ok for the time being, but my life really needs excitement.

i love him so much it just turns to hate

I fake it so much I am beyond fake, and some day you will ache like i ache

I've been listening to Hole so much recently; I can really relate to it recently.

but yeah, anyway, first day of school today; it was exactly like a normal day of school in 2009 in which nothing happens. It was full of dragged-out conversations about weather where people felt a need to talk, exchanges ofwhat christmas presents so and so received (money, clothes, camera, laptop) and nervous laughter in abundance. saying this, i, like the impudent hypocrite that i am, do exactly that so i won't feel so insecure about being anti-social. But enough with negativities, i daresay you've had enough of that. School was quite fun: I liked my lessons, I saw people I liked again who i really quite missed and I ate a lot :| I really need to sort my diet plan out, it's going all over the place. No i'm not trying to do a: "I'M GOING ON A DIET BECAUSE I'M SO FAT (sayimskinnyorimightcry)." I just find really skinny appealing. If i were to genetically modify myself i'd be tall, really thin and really pale. that's so nice. but oh well i shan't wallow in the fact that i'm not tall or ridiculously skinny. I'm not hideous, so that should be fine.

I do have a rather large problem that's weighing on my mind, though; screw new year's resolutions. I'm afraid I can't be truly expressive on this though, because a lot of people can read this. I wouldn't have any friends if I were to say what I really wanted to. But I guess that's the disadvantage of a blog, if i don't want people to read it then i shouldn't advertise it on my msn. ok whatever. It's sad that everyone I should care about doesn't even give me the time of day, but the people that give me the time of day i really don't like. like that, of course. mainly dickens, although shakespeare is creeping up again as well. I bring it upon myself though, really, I should appreciate what I have. I've mindlessly been blabbering, I can't even be bothered to check my punctuation, sorry..

and i'd burn every bridge that i cross, to find some beautiful place to get lost

happy new year everyone. I wasn't that excited about new years to be honest, but i'm a killjoy so that's to be expected. If you think about it, we invented our time, so we invented our months, and january just so happens to be the beginning of another year. do you get me? I had a pretty shit new years to be honest. While everyone was having fun spending new years together i was, uh, sitting in a room with family friends being really bored. I'm banned off the internet anyway, for drinking too much. ¬¬
So for the past few days i've been reading, trying to play guitar, watching top gear re-runs and staring at the walls. i've honestly been so bored and pretty depressed to be honest, but i get on with it. It's school tomorrow and i'm looking forward to getting into a familiar routine and what not. The holidays have been majorly shit :) but hopefully this "year" will be better than the last, even though nothing has happened so far, i have high hopes for it
anyway, my dad's coming downstairs so i better dash off pretty quickly
bye everyone..