it's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life for me: and i'm feeling good

Ok, so i'm writing in my blog again. I knew I'd be overtaken by this urge sometime.

I feel changes must be made, and today is a day of new beginnings.

I've allowed my life to descend and I haven't even cared that I have been estranging myself from everyone by this wall of bitterness and hate. So, I will compose a list, yes a list, but i beseech everyone to read this, because I truly extend to all of you with heartfelt apology. To everyone I have laughed at because of your clothes, to everyone I have bitched about continuously and then pretended to like them to their face, to everyone that might care that i didn't care back, I'm sorry. I'm going to try and be a more tolerant person, and I will stop over analysing your behaviour with frantic haste, and hating you and the world even more for it. I think I owe a few apologies in particular, and they probably know who they are. Actually, they probably don't because i pretend to be nice to them. Oh dear...

ANYWAY, as from now i am not drinking or smoking for a year, i don't need alcohol or drugs to enjoy myself, and maybe this way when I'm out I'll actually get to know people better, instead of drunkenly insulting them. I sheepishly apologise to you all, again. So i vow to do the following:

1. I vow to actually care about school. Too long it has been that i have neglected my school work, and i've just been in pointless detentions when i could be doing something more constructive with my time.

2. As i said above, I vow not to drink, smoke or do anything bad for a year. I'm pretty sure this will fail, but let's give it a go

3. I vow to stop bitching about people. Actually this will never work, but it's worth a try.

4. I vow to be a better, more pleasant person, and to appreciate the world, and to stop being so depressed and doing stuff to myself. because, Jee eun was right: If i think the world is bad, I need to do good things to make it better.

SO, to conclude: i'm sorry everyone. Maybe we can start a clean slate? I'm saying this to a few people in particular who i don't really talk to properly anymore, and which i regret because they are very interesting deep down, i'm sure. They probably won't be reading this because I'm nothing to them, I think. But it's worth a try, is it not? And of course, sorry to those people who i DO talk to, who I've been a spiteful arrogant prick to.